Right through the heart.
Have you had days when you feel like everything’s just not right?
I’m having one of those days now and I foresee more to come. Really.
And there are times when it feels like I don’t fit in anywhere. It’s like I can’t find a definite place where I can be fully comfortable and under these conditions, when people reject me or when I’m faced with multiple rejections. It only makes things worse.
When you know you’re the cause of it and you can’t do anything about it to make everyone or things better, you can’t help but ask yourself why are things going downhill. And I’m faced with the irony that it’s a new beginning. Hello 2011, you haven’t exactly been very nice to me.
When I make mistakes, I learn from them but if you don’t already know me, I’ve got a limited amount of memory space in that brain of mine so I tend to push all the unhappiness right to the back of my mind and fill them up with happy thoughts. In other words, I forget and erase what I have to. Maybe that’s why I don’t bear grudges, cos I’m forgetful. My, is that a good thing or not? At least, that’s how I get through or how I TRY to get through when I’m feeling all down and out. And when I make mistakes, I don’t just apologize to get out of it because I know what I’ve done and I truly feel sorry for whatever that I’ve done. I wouldn’t even apologize if I know that it’s even just ridiculous to do so.
And I’ve learnt that sometimes apologies just ain’t enough. It was a very expensive lesson and honestly I’ve no idea how else to redeem myself. How else to prove my sincerity and how else to prove that what I’ve said was merely a state of a lost of control cos’ of the very fact that I was consumed by my emotions. I guess this is why even in the toughest of times, people grit their teeth and pull through because when emotions get the better of people, things just really don’t go their way.
I’ve no idea why I’m submitting and opening up another part of me to the cyber world but yes this is what I’m doing.
I don’t need everyone to understand or like me or accomodate me but at the very least, I need those whom I love to do so because every relationship forged with anyone that has blood running through their veins matter to me. A mutual relationship with anyone matters so much more to me than you can ever imagine even if I don’t show it enough.
I’ve tried everything and right now, I’m just gonna let time do the job and as for myself, I really do need all the motivation & support from within myself to get back on track.
You know how much one means to the other, when one tears for another.
Mr Sun, come out for CNY~
Pineapple Tarts!
Hong Kong with lala was awesome! Chinese New Year is around the corner (:
And I seriously want the rain to stop. It has been raining for the entire of today.
Recent Addictions.
I’m hooked on songs by Michael Buble & 30 Seconds To Mars, thanks to Jas. Hahaha. I love the Music Videos from 30 Seconds To Mars. Dang. It’s just that good. For the record, it’s not the typical Music Video you’d expect it to be. 
Michael Buble
30 Seconds To Mars
And lastly, Andrew Garfield! I can’t wait for Spiderman 4. He should have acted as Spiderman from the beginning and replace Tobey Maguire from the beginning. Hahahaha. Just my personal opinion!
Andrew Garfield
I might switch to a new blogging medium I shall keep this in view. Hehe. Toodles~
I should consider getting myself a pair of earphones & another external harddrive since I’ve got Epi Center vouchers from best friend. Hmmm. Tomorrow, perhaps
FlipVideo.
I’m already lying in bed but let me share something with you. See that picture above? That’s something that I would like to get soon! For you guys who have no idea what it is, it’s called the Flip. It’s a video camera that shoots in HD. See that?! HIGH-DEFINITION! For that Mini HAND-HELD size! It even comes with image-stabilizer for the other two models. How freaking awesome is that?!
I know everyone’s currently into the I-want-a-Polaroid trend. Whatever it’s called. I’m just not into the Polaroid thing. I mean, yes you get instant pictures. To do what?! To SCAN & UPLOAD them on FaceBook. Seriously? And probably open an album where you keep all your Polaroid photos. Just Saying. This whole paragraph is not intended to mock anyone who has a Polaroid, in fact I love the idea of having my own Polaroid. Too bad, I’m a realistic person I’d probably save up that few hundred bucks or so, top it up and get myself a Flip video cam!
And when you’re done recording, you can simply plug it into your MacBook or whatever Laptop you’re using to upload it. It’s that simple, save the need for the wires and all. Damn. This is absolutely awesome. Cisco rocks for introducing this new product into the market. I can’t wait to lay my hands on it. That is if I save up enough and freaking get it for myself. Yes, I’m excited. Can you sense my excitement? I can’t be a professional film maker but at least I get to do up my own videos right? Well, a girl can dream
And NO, I’m not doing an advert for CISCO. I’m doing it because this is how much I like their product. Alright, rock on. Have a great night!
In fact, head to theflip and see in DETAILS, how awesome it is!
Wondering it it’s cheaper if I get in from the States. Will ask my Cousin about that since she’s living there now
Image Credits:
www.projectgadget.com
www.snipsly.com
